By Elise Ellsworth
On a trip to the Massachusetts, US, shore my husband and I found ourselves in a heated disagreement. The topic has of course escaped my memory, but a family trip had definitely gone sour. As the words of anger flew back and forth we noticed out of the corner of our eye our happy two year old son, toddling precariously into the salty ocean water. I am ashamed to admit that so great was our anger, so compelling our desire to be right, that we completely ignored our son and continued our quarrel. Our son did not go far and our disagreement was resolved. However, that image of our son in the ocean has never left my memory. After that experience I began a quest to strengthen my own marriage so that my children could have a more stable and happy home life.
In my years of blogging at United Families International I have often found myself wondering why I do what I do? Why do I keep blogging about family issues when defenders of the family are seen by many as bigoted, and when I risk offending others. Most people in the United States do not live the lifestyles I am advocating. Most people either have been, or will be, divorced, cohabit, have an abortion, have sex before marriage, or will be in a same-sex relationships. Why not just let go and go with the flow?
I keep swimming because I learned that day at the ocean that our choices, whether we like it or not, affect children. We cannot escape from the far reaching consequences that our choices have on those innocent persons who depend on us for life and happiness. Premarital sex affects children. Divorce affects children. Cohabitation affects children. Buying and selling embryos affects children. Abusive behavior affects children. Marital strife affects children. We need to understand the consequences of our choices for the children because the happiness and well-being of our children is central to our nation, central to our world, and central to life itself.
The traditional family – a happily married father and mother with children – is still the gold-standard for children. It is the best we have. No other lifestyle has proven superior in caring and providing for children. Not single parenthood. Not cohabitation. Not same-sex marriage. We can try to turn a blind eye. We can pursue our own agenda with vigilance. But in the end we must ask ourselves: Will the consequences be satisfactory? Will they be best for the children?
For more information on the effects of our modern lifestyle choices on children, please see United Families International’s extensive resources available in our Guides to Family Issues.